Hösten är här!
Kyliga morgnar med frusna småhundar som huttrar och kissvägrar trots kraftig bepälsning…
Träd och buskar bär gulröd skrud, solen lyser svagare och svagare från sin ljusblå himmel och alla dofter har förvandlats från en solvarm bris av somriga blommor och nyklippt gräs till en virvlande höstvind av något murrigt, skogslikt, fuktigt, höstigt som lekande lätt letar sig upp i våra småförkylda höstnäsor och väcker slumrande minnen till liv… Nu har alltså tiden på året kommit när det är dags att tända en massa ljus, ta på mjuka raggsockar och slitna mysbyxor och frossa loss på mustiga grytor, helstekta kötträtter och ugnsbakade rotfrukter med kraftiga såser…
Ja, frossa loss kan ni som har tänder göra, själv puréar jag allt och intar slabbet med tesked men det låter ju inte alls lika charmigt, och fräscht liksom.
Hur som helst! Eftersom vi har ovanligt långväga såväl som väldigt kortväga finbesök detta veckoslut, beslöt jag mig hastigt och lustigt för att jag ska briljera med en av mina paradrätter; ugnsstekt tupp med tillbehör, vilket dessutom är alldeles ypperligt passande en höstig dag som denna.
Sagt och gjort!
Tupp köptes.
Men hur gjorde jag nu förra hösten, när femkilosklumpen skulle tillagas…?
Snabbt letade jag upp ett passande recept på nätet:
Köp en tupp.
Ta ett glas whiskey.
Sätt tuppen i ugnen.
Ta två glas whiskey till.
Sätt ugnen på 275 grader.
Ta tre glas whiskey till.
Slå på ugnen.
Ta fyra glassar whiskey till.
Tupp öset.
Gå och flaska en till whiskey hämt.
Sätt en tupp i termometern.
Glasa dig ett hållning whiskey till.
Ugnsbaka whiskeyn i fyra timmar.
Ta ut ugnen ur tuppen.
Ta ut ugnen ur tuppen.
Plocka upp golvet från tuppen.
Tuppa upp skäret.
Hämta en whiska flaskey till.
Buka dordet och häll tupp ett glas fågel.
Bord en bedsbön och ät whiskeyn.
Lät väl fint! 😃
Problemet är att jag inte har nån whiskey för den har Mattias druckit upp. Däremot har jag rödvin och piratrom. Det kanske funkar? Fast inte nu, klockan är ju bara barnet. Och jag är inte alkoholiserad. Än.
Tupp förresten.
Varför finns det så många talesätt, citat och ordstäv med just tupp? Det har jag funderat ett tag på. Säkert i fyra-fem minuter eller så.
Jag menar, är tuppen verkligen ett så viktigt djur att den kan multitillskrivas epiteten stolt, morgonpigg och högljudd och tydligen har så pass avancerad sexualdrift att den får figurera i så många olika hänseenden? Spännande djur, det där! Vem behöver ett savannens lejon eller en skogens konung när man har en tupp, liksom?
Kolla här bara:
”Vara uppe med tuppen”
”Stolt som en tupp”
”Få tuppjuck”
”Få en tupp i halsen”
”Det kommer en ny dag även om inte tuppen gal”
”Tuppen aktas för sin sång, människan föraktas för sitt tal”
”Ruska tupp”
”En tupp ska inte sjunga på två tak”
”Ta en tupplur”
”Nationalism är en korkad tupp som kacklar på sin egen dynghög”
”Bättre en tupp i lergrytan än en häst i lasagnen” (modern svensk tappning på gammalt ordstäv)
Tilläggas bör att detta är ett treminuters axplock av sökresultatet från ”citat om tupp” och ”tupp + ordstäv”. Sedan var jag ju bara tvungen att testa frasen ”funny things to say about a cock”.
Ja, ja. Jag vet att det var löjligt men jag har sådana moments. 🙂
Ganska många om jag ska vara ärlig.
Bilderna jag fick upp på den sista sökningen var ytterst opassande i matsamnanhang.
Googla själv om du är nyfiken.
Faktiskt blir nästan allt tramsigt kul om man översätter ovanstående tuppassocierade uttryck till engelska!
Det får liksom en kul twist, speciellt ”få en tupp i halsen”….!! 😀
Jag tror att jag har fått för mycket tid till mitt förfogande.
Efter en stunds avancerat googlande har jag nu hittat ett seriöst recept helt utan whiskey, som jag så klart måste modifiera. Receptet alltså. Inte whiskyn.
ET VOLIÁ!
Den äpple-och katrinplommonspäckade tockajävern är i ugnen, jordärtskockssoppan puttrar stillsamt, den hemgjorda pressgurkan är under hård press, och nu ser jag fram emot att inta mina tre dagliga lunchpiller vilket gör mig nästan lika euforiskt glad som att höra ”Good Vibrations” med Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch från tidigt nittiotal, på radion! Stolt som en tupp över mina matlagningsbravader följde jag mina glada impulser och testade att göra några fräcka chicken dance moves (eller Funky chicken kanske det heter?) a la sextiotal, stilfullt ackompanjerat med ett par fjäderlätta och garanterat supercoola hip hop-skutt som hade gjort Vanilla Ice rön av avund. Det passade perfekt till de tuffa, funkiga, poppiga tonerna, jag lovar!
Det är fan kul att skaka loss när man är ensam!
Eller ensam och ensam: själv på nedanvånigen i alla fall.
”Yeah, yeah, mmmhmmm, funky, funky!” lallade jag sådär nonchalant och stentufft mellan flåsningarna.
Blev abrupt avbruten av ett oväntat ljud.
Ett barn garvade och tjöt av skratt från trappan!?
Vafalls!?
Den där ungtuppen förstår sig uppenbarligen inte på musikkultur och kvalificerad dansteknik.
Möjligen hade det sett snäppet bättre ut om jag hade gått lös på den där whiskyn vi inte hade?
HRMPF!
Nä, jag tror jag går och tar mig en tupplur istället i väntan på att kycklingen ska bli en kalkon.
Här var det ju ett jäkla kacklande!
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