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Sinnesfrid? Ja tack. NU.

2014-01-14

Varför kan jag inte bara ha ett normalt huvud som alla andra? Varför måste alla tankar gå på högvarv jämt?
Jag som aldrig brukar vara nervös. Eller orolig. Jag som brukar gilla lite ombytlighet och spännande grejer…! Är det våren som stundar som är oviss och därmed besvärlig…? En osäker framtid som väntar med jobbet, pluggandet, de otaliga tandläkarbesöken, sjukgymnastiken. Hur lång tid kommer det att ta? Var ska jag jobba i sommar? Kommer det att funka att göra allt på en gång…? Och hur ska jag kunna hjälpa andra när jag känner mig rätt vilsen i pannkakan själv?
Jag vill veta.
NU.
Nervositeten, sömnlösheten och den återkommande känslan av att vara kass, oduglig och otillräcklig har aldrig varit starkare. Fastän jag vet att jag inte är det, så växer tvivlet inom mig. Är det den här nytillkomna osäkerheten som gör att jag har huvudvärk, är illamående och har hjärtklappning?
Jag som aldrig är osäker på mig själv!Nu är jag det.
Och vem fan har installerat en
cementblandare i min mage!?
Tycker att det är orättvist.
Jag är väl ganska snäll.
Oftast.
Så ge mig lite jävla sinnesro!
Svaren på alla mina frågor skickas vänligen i punktform till:
jagvillvarasomvanligt@just.nu eller skriv dem som kommentar nedan,
så jag kan få lite själsligt lugn och ro.
NUNUNU.
Du ombedes även bifoga en fil: en resa till framtiden, till juni 2014, när allt kommer att vara bra.
Tack på förhand.
Spiderman

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